7 ways to a better relationship

“Relationships are Hard Work”

–by Kenneth “KJ” Jackson

(@KJuelzNYC)







All types of relationships are hard work. Whether it is father/daughter, mother/son, or boyfriend/girlfriend, they all take some type of effort to help them grow beautifully. Now let us just focus on the boyfriend/girlfriend aspect of a relationship. I have a few of my female friends come up to me all the time and ask me why their significant others seems to ignore them, and not pay attention to them after like a month of dating. I stated to them that the “honeymoon” period was over and now reality is setting in. One of them in particular can’t seem to get past 5 months with every boyfriend she has been with. I told her it is because she always gives up everything in a relationship in the first week. You want to be respected in a relationship ladies, do not give up everything you have to offer in a week. I know that sex has become so desensitized here in the United States, but does that not mean that you need to give up your own self-respect and control. I always hear people say that sex is a relationship and without that you have nothing. Are you kidding me? Sex does not pay the bills (for those of you in relationships where you both live together). Yes, sex is absolutely a part of a relationship with your significant other, but it is not the end to all means.

You are wondering why you sitting at home and you trying to spend time with your man and he does not come over, why should he? You guys have been together 3 weeks and he has already had sex with you, taken your car, you help pay his bills, cook for him, and buy him whatever he needs. There is no reason for him to spend time with you. He has nothing else to anticipate in that relationship. Now this is not all guys, I am talking about a specific type of guy.

To my gentleman, I know it may be hard to stay faithful in a relationship. You have no idea how many guys that I know that just cannot stay faithful. So why get into a relationship? You do not have to lock one down and keep doing your thing. That is wrong. Gentleman need to remember to be respectful when they are in relationships. We were all born from a female, you would not want someone giving your mother or sister a hard time in a relationship, then you shouldn’t give a hard time either.



Relationships are tough. However, you can make them work with “K.J.’s 7 Ways to a Better Relationship”:

1. Make sure you pick a significant other who is of the same socio-economic status as you. Which means don’t date the drug dealer, when you are about to graduate with a Bachelors Degree.


2. Make time for each other.


3. Find new and improved ways to spice up your relationship (i.e. salsa dancing, or putting a pole in the bedroom).


4. Tell each other that you love each other every single day and night.


5. Travel the country or world together, take vacations.


6. Respect each other, and yourselves.


7. The most important rule I follow in a relationship is to COMMUNICATE. It is so very important to communicate with one another. Do not hold stuff in, however, do not be disrespectful when you have a disagreement with one another. This is the true way to keep a relationship alive.


If you have your own rules that I did not put up here, give me your feedback!

Interview that I did w/ Rasheeda for www.RETROmalure.com

I was given the wonderful opportunity to talk with ATL’s own Georgia Peach, Rasheeda aka Boss Bitch. Rasheeda has been in the industry quite sometime, and is now making an even bigger buzz for herself. She is currently on the remix to Timbaland and Drake’s “Say Something (Remix)” with Nivea. Find out what has been going on in her life, and what upcoming projects she’s working on, and her thoughts on the music industry, and more.




-There are different reports online about your origins. Some reports say that you are from Brooklyn, NY others say Atlanta, GA. Can you set the record straight and let everyone know where Ms. Rasheeda is orginally from?

*laughs* I was laughing at the Brooklyn. I love New York, but I was just like where did Brooklyn come from? I was born in Illinois, but I’ve been in Georgia ever since I was a little girl with my mother. I was born in Illinois, and I’ve been in Georgia almost all my life. I’m a Georgia peach, please believe it.



-For those are just finding out who Rasheeda is you've been in the game for quite some time. Not only were you in a group, but you are several albums deep as a solo artist. How was did you transition from being a group member to become a solo artist?

You know, I thought is was gonna be hard because I was used to having teammates next to me, my group members next to me, and us going in a doing records together. It was a fairly easy transition. I was just so hungry for music and have such a deep love for it. I went to D-Lo and said hey the group, we’re separating and I want to keep going. It was quick for him to say, you know Rasheeda I know you want this, are you ready for everything that comes with it? I was like yes let’s go full-fledged. I just went for it, and I’ve been going for it ever since.





-Rasheeda, you are known as a songwriter as well as being an artist. Do you find it more challenging to write songs based on your own experiences, or more challenging to write for other artists?

Honestly, it is not a challenge either way to me, really. I have been so blessed to have a really great exciting life. I’m able to pull from everyday things, from things that I see other people do. So it’s fairly easy. What really moves me is music. Like when I hear great tracks, then it’s easy for me to just go in and do me. When I work with other artists, I like to talk to them and just have general conversation, and listen to their lingo. Especially a lot of words they like to repeat, that’s their own words, like ‘Yeah Shawty’. You know whatever their little terminologies are; I like to put that in other people’s music that I write as well. It showcases them as who they are naturally. I just pull from them and their experiences, listen to them talk, and we make a song.



-There's a song on your latest album Certified Hot Chick titled "Betta Off Alone." Some of the lyrics are: "I let my guard down and there he went selling me dreams/And it's a shame, I thought I had someone on my team/But he was slowly tryna break down my self-esteem." In your opinion, why do people stay in relationships, when they know their better of alone?

Because you don’t want to think that, I think that a lot of women have experienced that. I know friends of mine have. Sometimes when you’re in a relationship, you want so badly to think that that’s where you’re supposed to be. In reality, that’s not healthy for you. I’ve been there, I know girlfriends that have been there, and it’s hard to let go. You’re thinking oh my gosh I’ve been with this person, and I haven’t really been without this person, but I’m not able to be me in this relationship. How you gonna be in a relationship when you can’t do and be yourself? You as an individual is supposed to bring something to the table, and that is yourself. If you can’t do and be you in a relationship, that’s not healthy.



-There has been alot of positve buzz surrounding the "Say Something (Remix)" ft. Nivea? How did that collabo come about?

It literally just came about. I called Nivea and I was like girl, time to get back to it. We been really cool for a really long time. We always worked together. I’ve been on her “Complicated” album. We did remixes to Akon’s ‘I Wanna Love You’, and ‘Slow Motion’ remix back in the day. It had been a minute, and I was working on my new mixtape, and I was like I gotta call my girl and tell her come on let’s get in the studio, and crank this thang up like we used to. Of course, she was all for it and she’s actually just starting up on her new album. So we are back in doing music together, as well as working on our individual projects. I love that originally record Drake killed it, Timbaland killed it. I love the song, and I knew Nivea totally loved it, and knew we both had something that we wanted to express on there. It was just perfect, and I love it. It came out really great.





-Ok, on the song "oh let's do it" there's a line "I'm the new it girl minus the fake butt" is that directed at anyone?

You know what? *laughs* People are hilarious. First let me say this, that’s a remix too, as well as the “Say Something”. The originally version is from Waka Flocka, he’s out of Atlanta. That’s on my Boss Bitch mixtape coming at the end of this month, or the beginning of February. Boss Bitch Music is the mixtape and both of those songs are on there. No, I was not directing that towards anybody. What I was referring to is, I stay in Atlanta and booty shots and shit is normal down here. So I was just referring to the fact that nowadays dudes look at asses on girls, like a girl walking around with a puppy in a doggy bag. Unfortunately, some women are taking it to an extreme, who don’t have it, they might want to go get they booty done or where booty pads, whatever they do, that’s them, I’m not anything against that. I was just referring to having an ass is like the new it thing. I’m the new it girl minus the fake butt, because I ain’t went and got mines done. I ain’t went and bought me no booty pads, whose to say I will never do it, but I wasn’t referring to anyone. It’s so funny to me how people think they know shit, but they don’t know what they be talking about, but it’s all good.





-In the past you've collaborated with Kandi, Akon, Kaleena (from P.Diddy's group Dirty Money), The Dream, and Birdman? Who are some other people that you would like to collaborate with in the future?

I want to work with Kanye, he’s awesome. I like Drake, Andre 3000 is like someone I really want to work with. He is just so dope to me, and I’m anticipating him coming with some new music. I would like to work with Neyo, Beyonce, Lady Gaga, just to name a few. I would like to work with Jay-Z, gone on to get some Jigga on the track.



-As an artist, what do you think of the state of the music industry today?

You know what, I’m so glad it’s getting back to more real music. For a minute we was through this phase of anything goes, and it was going. Right now I’m noticing myself as I’m on the internet, as I’m doing records and putting them out there and seeing what people is going for, they’re really into lyrics now. I’m glad because that is great for our real artists that have real lyrics. People are wanting to start to hear real music and that’s a great thing. People are only going to buy real music because the bullshit music why would people by when they can get it for free? People are like time to get to that feel good music that can help me in relationships, and the bullshit that I am going through. It is time to be uplifted.



-Give three adjectives that describes up who you are as an individual.

I’m extremely outgoing. I’m a Boss Bitch *laughs*. I’m a real grinder. I don’t believe in things being handed to me, or riding anybody’s coattails. I’m an outgoing, strong, confident, independent woman, tryna get it in where I fit in, and not stopping till I get it. That was a whole bunch of words *laughs*.



-You dress very nice what influences your style and who is your favorite designer?

Well I’m a Gemini, one day I might be on some t-shirts and jeans. The next day, my other personality my kick in, and want to throw on a dress. So sneakers one day, and heels the next. I’m one of those types of people who will go to Target and get a t-shirt, and then to Neiman’s to get a jacket. Some of the clothes, I like Patricia Fields, and then I also like Forever 21. You know, I’ll switch it up. I like Saks too. Bag wise, I like of course Louis Vuitton, and Gucci. I like Louboutins, and I have the Dior shoes, but then I’ll go to H&M. I mix and match a lot. I believe fashion is a part of who you are, and I’m a whole bunch of shit so, I change it up all the time.





-Are you dating anyone?

If y’all listen to “Say Something” that is where I’m at right now. I was previously in a real tight situation, however things got a little funky. I’m cool and complacent because I know there is a extremely special someone waiting out there for me.





-What's up next for Rasheeda, and where can your fans or new fans reach out to you at?

Please follow me on Twitter. I am Twitter, I be tweeting, and yes that’s me. I am @RASHEEDAGAPEACH. I’m also on YouTube, you can check me out at www.youtube.com/dlo117, you can check out all my videos. What I have next, I am getting ready to drop a new mixtape called Boss Bitch Music, and of course it will have the “Say Something (Remix)”, and the Ester Dean “Drop it Low (Remix)”. There will also be original songs that I’m featured on there as well. I’m getting started on a brand new album that I’m looking to drop later this year.

I’ve got some TV stuff I’ve been working on. I’m still writing for other artist. I got a lot of stuff placed on television and movies, and getting more and more placements, which is going well, and is a blessing.



-Lastly, we like to do something at RetroMalure called "Celebrity Advice". It can be any piece of advice that helped you out in your own life. What would be that advice you would like to give to your fans out there.

My main thing people should do, please but God first. Make sure you pray and stay focused on what you’re trying to achieve. The world is turning so microscopic to certain things, and it can be extremely negative but you have to stay built up and have to stay focused. You get a lot of rejection and negativity when you’re in any business, especially when you’re being successful. I try to tell people don’t get discouraged it can be discouraging, stay focused, get a good team of people around you, go full-fledged, and don’t let anyone tell you, you can’t do it. A lot of people that are successful, there was a lot of failure that came before the success came, so don’t get discouraged by that. Understand that builds you to be the person, you are supposed to be in your life.

Article by: Kenny Jackson and Malik

Hey World! ADVICE COLUMN

Hey! Welcome to the World of Entertainment. I am your host Kay-J! This will be a fun experience to help uplift people, and support each other's goals and aspirations as well as also finding out the lastest going on in the entertainment world. If you need any advice this is the place to let your hair down, take your shades off, pull your pants up, and let's have a conversation. I am looking forward to taking this journey with y'all. Keep smiling one in your heart and one on your face!

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